Gemma Fox

In this day and age people are under a huge amount of stress from a variety of different sources. There doesn't seem to be a day go by when you yourself feel stressed or you meet or work with someone who is so completely stressed it appears to be taking over.

Apparently a small amount of stress is good for us and I would go along with that. A little bit of stress at work gives us the adrenalin boost to complete the task and go home feeling satisfied. Too much stress at work leaves us feeling dissatisfied at the end of the day so we go home with a disillusioned feeling of a task not completed and that sits on our minds so we don't completely relax.

However, we should relax at home. Work is work and home is home. We don't go to work worrying about not having done the dishes or finished building that shelf unit but we do go home worrying that we didn't send that email or finish that report.

Other pressures come at the weekend when people expect different things of you. They want you to visit them, come to their house for a dinner party or they want you to go shopping with them, see a movie with them, visit an exhibition with them. They want you to spend your weekend doing things when maybe, just once, you want to be lazy.

The pressure of doing things at the weekend can add on to the pressure built up during the week at work and eventually it adds up, builds up. Every so often you have to be firm and say 'No, I am having a ME day'.

There's nothing wrong with having Me days. In fact, they are essential and if anyone calls you selfish for wanting to spend time alone then say 'No, I'm recharging, I'm spending some time with myself because I need it'. The truth is, we all need it.

Don't know what to do on a Me day? Well, there's no set schedule. Just think of things you enjoy doing but don't normally get to do. Take the dog for a long walk. Don't shower, laze around in your lazy clothes watching DVDs and eating junk food. If you want to sleep for part of the day, do it. Do whatever it is that you know will relax you and chill you out.

You can be completely lazy on a Me day but the important thing is, don't feel guilty about it. If you don't leave the house for 24 hours and spend most of that on the sofa watching trashy TV then that's fine because it won't be long until you're back at work, or back facing the things that give you stress.

Maybe your Me day means taking a trip somewhere, even if you're alone. There's such a pressure to always be with someone and the popular misconception that if you're visiting somewhere alone then you have no friends. Well forget that. Going alone to a place you want to visit can be the most relaxing experience. Let's say it's an art gallery. If you're alone you can look at each exhibit for the length of time you want to and you can let your thoughts work without someone interrupting you to move onto the next thing. You can spend the entire day there without anyone bothering you.

Let's say you visit the beach. Watching large bodies of water is a very relaxing experience and sitting for hours watching waves lapping in and out can ease the tension almost without you knowing it but it can be difficult to achieve if there is someone with you interrupting you with commentary on what is going on around you.

So going somewhere alone is highly recommended.

Perhaps your don't even need an entire day. Maybe a Me evening will do but the same rules apply. Whatever you do must be what you want to do so you shouldn't allow people to pressure you into going to the pub for a drink or to a movie if that's not what you want to do.

Everyone should have some sort of Me time. It's important for many reasons, it gives you time to relax without others around, time to reflect within yourself. Some people don't want to reflect on themselves but essentially it's something we must do, especially if we have niggling feelings that things aren't right, that things could change.

As much as you may enjoy the company and times with others, enjoy the time with yourself just as much.